Grab some popcorn,
pajamas, and some wine cause we’re having a girl’s night. Without a doubt, I am
the friend that forces the group to watch horror movies at the sleepover. If
you invite me over you can guarantee that I’m packing a copy of The Exorcist and
my favorite Halloween pajamas.
Call up your squad
and pour yourself a glass of rosé because today we’re discussing horror films
that are all about the ladies.
Teeth. Yes – this is
the film about a girl with teeth in her…ahem, vagina. Despite how ridiculous this
sounds; this black comedy was quite brilliant. The film focuses on Dawn, who
discovers that she has Vagina Dentata after she bites the penis off a guy who
was attempting to sexually assault her. She soon realizes that if she’s
relaxed, and the situation is consensual that her teeth do not come out. Let
that be a lesson on consent, folks.
Rosemary’s Baby. This
critically acclaimed film is a classic based on the soundtrack and
cinematography alone. Ah, the joys of motherhood. A time that’s supposed to be
beautiful quickly turns into a mother’s worst nightmare when she finds out her
child is the spawn of Satan. And I don’t mean the child is a little
temperamental, I mean he’s the literal Antichrist.
The Craft. This film
is what Mean Girls would be if The Plastics had a goth phase. It has all the
qualities of your favorite chick flick – only the clique in this film is a
coven of witches. If this film doesn’t have you attempting to play “light as a
feather, stiff as a board” at your party then you need to watch it again.
Ginger Snaps. As if
puberty wasn’t hard enough, try adding lycanthropy into the mix. Your body is
changing, you’re growing hair in places you’ve never grown hair before, then
there’s the fangs and the whole “tearing boys to shreds” things – it’s all a
bit much. If you thought your teenage years were bad, you need to watch Ginger Snaps.
The Descent. A group
of friends set out to explore an unmapped cave system in the Appalachian
Mountains, in the hopes of being the first to do so. Unfortunately for them,
they discover they weren’t the first and the ones that came before them
mysteriously never made it out. The feeling of claustrophobia in this film is
almost palpable. Seeing the women crawl through narrow paths and stuck in tight
spaces almost makes it hard for the viewer to breathe. It’s a test of strength as
the characters fight tooth and nail to not only find their way out, but to
escape death as they encounter a hoard of cannibalistic humanoids hidden deep
in the cave.
Inside. If you’re in
the mood for something gruesome and can handle some gore, then you’ll enjoy
this. A pregnant woman, still dealing with the trauma of losing her husband, is
tormented by a strange woman that breaks into her house. Her goal – to cut the
woman’s child out with a pair of scissors. It’s a bloody thrill ride from
beginning to end.
American Mary. A brilliant film by Jen and Sylvia Soska. Medical student, Mary Mason, is struggling to make ends meet and gets thrown into the world of extreme body modification. She withdraws from school after being sexually assaulted by one of her former professors. She eventually gets her revenge and puts her newfound modification skills to the test.
All Cheerleaders Die.
This black comedy is ridiculous in the best way possible. A cheerleading squad
gains supernatural powers after being brought back to life after a car
accident. Moral of the story? If your abusive, shitty boyfriend cheats on you –
break up with him and date a cheerleader.
May. One of the more
underrated films on this list. May is socially awkward, still a bit traumatized
from a childhood accident that left her with a glass eye. Fed up with her
overwhelming loneliness, she tries to make friends, but it never goes right.
Growing desperate, she decides to make new friends… literally. Piece by piece.
Jennifer’s Body. Did
you really think I’d have a list like this and not include the most iconic film
ever? Who do you think I am? A cheerleader becomes a succubus after being sacrificed
to Satan by a generic emo band that thought she was a virgin. She survives by
killing boys. On top of that, the soundtrack for this film is incredible and
includes bops from bands like Panic! At The Disco and All Time Low.
That’s a wrap on this
Women in Horror Month series! A HUGE thank you to Women in Horror Month for
featuring me and to all the wonderful creators that contributed to celebrating
the phenomenal women that dominate the horror scene.
Seen all of these. I tell you it was a hassle to be attentive even though I liked them. Build on the scripts because female eye candy works.
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